"I've lived a life that's full. I've traveled each and every highway. But, more much more than this, I did it my way. "
They are quite possibly Frank Sinatra's most famous lyrics, and part of my dad's morbid request for his future headstone inscription— the words of "My Way" always seemed a little arrogant to me. Not everyone gets it to do it their way Mr. Sinatra. And although my dad seems to think he has it his way in our household, he never can have full control living with four women and a female dog.
But as I get older I think I've come to understand what ol' blue eyes was really bragging about. Through recent personal developments (i.e. the spare time between writing cover letters and checking Facebook), I've come to realize how incredibly important, and not always selfish, it is to do things your way.
Doing things your way doesn't necessarily mean being selfish—it means owning who you are in the truest sense and being completely honest and genuine in your actions. And anyone, not just those with a celebrity lifestyle like Frank Sinatra, is capable of that.
"What is a man? What has he got? If not himself, than he has naught."
Because, really, what are you if not yourself? Being who you truly are and living accordingly not only requires you to do the things you truly know are right for you, but it also requires you to own up to your mistakes.
"There are times, I'm sure you knew, when I bit off more than I could chew. But through it all, when there was doubt, I ate it up and spit it out. I faced it all and I stood tall and did it my way."
Imagine if we could cut through the b.s. that infliltrates our daily activities and did what our true selves really desired? I've always been a believer that everyone's true self has good intentions, which makes this concept even more enticing.
It seems the public is enticed by this idea as well since it has been reflected in everything from shows like Jersey Shore, which has exposed us to the honest, sometimes vile, activities of actual 20-(and for The Situation 30-) somethings, to technology like Facebook, which has helped to tear down the walls between us and our "friends,"
Although I don't think Jersey Shore reflects the truest selves of its cast, and I realize these mediums leave room for inauthenticity just like anything else, I do think they have helped lay the foundation for, and show a collective public desire for, transparency and honesty.
It's as if we are asking for, and are starting to create, a world where honesty is cherished over secrecy. Where the examination of actions is no longer saved for the confessional booth or for deathbeds, but in our lives every single day. Where we can admit to our mistakes and insecurities to help others dealing with the same issues. Where we can all agree that the truth does indeed set you free.
Although I am not certain that 100% honesty is always the best policy or zero privacy is a good thing, I do think being honest with yourself opens the doors for you to connect with others, which in turn helps to spread a sense of community, friendship, and love.
Oprah's initials serendipitously help to spell out the name of her new network OWN—a word and idea she embraces as part of her life's mission. On the network's show Master Class both Oprah and the featured guest Diane Sawyer praised the importance of being their true selves and surrounding themselves with people that continually bring out who they are in the truest sense.
Diane, who has helped expose and resolve the plights of many through her investigative journalism, and Oprah who has been exceedingly generous with her sharing of self and her assets, both attribute their success for helping others to this very quality of authenticity.
Who knew doing it your way could actually help so many others?
Despite my previous assumptions, I now know why my dad aspires to have this written on his headstone, and I hope one day I too will look back and say: "Yes, it was my way."
